New Trojan Sex Census Says Philly Folk Have the Best Sex

Trojan Sex Census

City Of Brotherly Love Also City Of Good Sex

According to the new Trojan sex census, Philadelphia is having the best sex. So while the city of brotherly love ranks high in crime and low in health, ya’ll are apparently having the best sex while your Los Angeles comrades are having the most, but are also faking the most orgasms. All those actors I suppose:

      “According to the survey, the average 18-and-older American has sex 120 times per year, but Angelenos are doing it 135 times a year. Yet we also rank seven out of 10 on the satisfaction scale at 75%.

What gives, L.A.? Are we too stressed from texting our agents and sitting on the 405 and waiting for a table at Umami Burger to be fulfilled in our sexual encounters? By the way, Angelenos are also most likely to have faked an orgasm. Because we have more actors here?

Philadelphia ranked 10th in sex frequency at 99 times per year, but was No. 1 for satisfaction level at 82%. Go figure.

While 47% surveyed considered themselves moderate in terms of sexual adventurousness, Los Angeles had the highest level of adventurousness. And Southerners are most likely to believe in abstinence before marriage, but San Franciscans are least likely to wait until the certificate is signed.”

Who knew Philadelphia was the place to go to get good, if not frequent, sex. And is anyone really surprised that Angelenos are faking it AND adventuresome all at the same time? I mean, everything else is fake out there – boobs, butt, hair color, hell faces – so it’s no wonder the orgasms are fake too.

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